Changing the mindset

So the hardest part of this whole YNAB thing is changing the mindset. I've mentioned this before but it's really coming up in the last few days and I feel the need to talk it out. So it is just so hard to come to terms with 'being broke' when there is money in the account. For that matter, it's hard to come to terms with the budget when it doesn't seem to match with the bank accounts. Let me explain:

Here is what my budget looks like:

This is just a piece of my budget. Notice the various categories I have, like Kindle Unlimited, HP Ink, and Bulwark. Notice also that some are orange, some are green, and some are red. The green means that I have money put aside for this bill but haven't spent it yet. The orange means that I have a bill coming up but haven't put any money aside for it. The red means that I spent money that I haven't budgeted for. So the medical and the stuff for school have not been budgeted for so they will show up in red until I 'cover' them from somewhere. The grey means that I have budgeted for it and spent it ao it's all good. The disconnect in my head happens because of this. I have not budgeted that money, but I have the money in my account to cover it.  I know logically that I have given some money other jobs and that is why I don't have the budget to cover this, but it just is not completely clicking in my head. The real problem is that I won't ever completely buy into this until it clicks in my head. Once I can wrap my mind around exactly what is happening, then I truly will be all in. Right now, I'm going through the motions but not completely buying into this. I need some lightning bolt to hit me and make everything crystal clear. And now as I'm typing this it is starting to make more sense. I don't have the 'budget' to cover this payment and the only way I can cover it is to move money that I have set aside for something else. So it's like virtual envelopes. I put some money in the car insurance envelope but may need to take it because I don't have enough in the medical envelope. Oh my god, I think I'm getting it.

This is just like what we do every payday. We pull out $300 in cash and split it up into envelopes. Groceries get $200, Charlie gets $60, and I get $40. That's what we have until next payday. If the grocery money runs short, then Charlie will take some of his own money to cover it. So we don't look at the total amount we have, $300, we look at what is available in each envelope. So if I have $40, I can spend $40 but if I only have $20, that's all I have. OMG!!! I feel like such an idiot. It took me so long to get this. So now I have to move things around between 'envelopes' to cover this and then I will have to refill the envelopes tomorrow when we get paid. Okay, so if I'm going to pay something that I don't have an envelope for, I need to move the money from one of the other envelopes to cover it. I then have to make sure to refill that envelope when I get more money. Okay, I can live with this now - I think. Sometimes I just have to 'talk' it through to really get it in my head.

More successes with money

After my post on Sunday, I was trying to figure out what to do with the money we had gotten when the Hubby reminded me of an outstanding tax bill from Hawaii. We left Hawaii 3 years ago and the final year we ended up owing taxes. It was $700 and while I hated to pay it, it felt nice to have it taken care of and out of the way. Then last night I remembered we had a $500 bill from the dentist, so I paid that too. I hated the fact that I used almost all of our windfall on bills, but I was super excited that I hadn't blown the money and still had it to pay the bills.

I think back on the way I used to think and it just kind of boggles my mind. In the past, I would have gotten that money, $1300, and would have started planning what I could spend it on. I would have wanted to blow it on useless stuff (much of which I have laying around my house) and wasted it. This time was very different. I did want to purchase some agility equipment but rather than basing it on how quickly I could get it, I based it on what I actually wanted, what would work for our set up, and price. Not necessarily the cheapest but the best value for the price. So I did that and I am very proud of myself. I could have spent almost $200 on the few pieces that I wanted. Instead, I spent <$100 and will make some of it myself. I'm excited. And I'm proud of myself. Instead of going off and buying things on a whim, I really put some thought into it. Something that I didn't use to do.

On the note of buying things on a whim, I have a number of things around my house that I bought and do not use. Over the summer I'm either going to sell them or start using them. I'm thinking of the 2 little printers I have. One I got at a garage sale for $5 the other I paid almost $100 for and they both work pretty much the same. So maybe I'll sell one for $50. Or I'll come up with a good way to use them. I also have a photo negative scanner that I'm going to use this summer. One of my projects is to get those negatives scanned and decide what to do with the pictures. I'll probably have books made for the kids and us, but I'll see. The summer will be spent using the things I have and not buying new things. Between my new mindset and my new attitude toward money, I'm looking forward to the summer.

WAMing

There is a term in the YNAB community - WAM.  It loosely stands for whack a mole, but really means that when unexpected expenses pop up you move money around to cover it. It's good in that it teaches you to be flexible with your money, unlike some other budgeting programs. So it's good......but.... 

I have been using YNAB almost 5 months now. And overall it's been an amazing experience. I finally feel like I have a really firm handle on our money. I finally feel like I know what I'm doing with our money. I really love it. I have not had an NSF in 4-5 months. That is amazing. Also, I have not had to sweat the last few days until payday in a long time. That is amazing too. To know with absolute certainty that there is money there and it's not going anywhere. I love it. But........

Things keep coming up. Things I didn't necessarily account for...or think about....or consider. And it's starting to drive me crazy. For example, I have a whole budget category set up for the dogs. In there are treats for them, pills they need, Mavys class fees, all things like that. I have them broken into separate categories even. And I think that's where the problem arises, but I don't want to get ahead of myself.  Here is what my dog category looks like:

As you can see, I have individual medications broken out for Bella and Lola, which I just realized I can combine into one category since they get them at the same time - every other month. Then I have the Amazon supplements that we get every month. The CBD oil which I'm not sure I can continue since it is so expensive and I go through a bottle every week and a half. Then I have Mavy's agility classes and his treats from Chewy, then the wellness plans for all 3, and finally the RunBuddy for Bella. When I break it up this way I need a category for everything that happens to them. Maybe I should just have a Bella, Lola, and Mavy category and calculate what they need each month and then fund that. Because this week I ordered Mavy some agility equipment and there is no category for that so where does it go? Also, he will be taking an extra agility class over the summer, where does that go? I think trying to be too detailed is going to kill me. I like details, but I also like things to be easy.

Maybe it's time to rethink and retool the budget again. I don't want to do a fresh start - again - but I'm not liking the categories and I hate having to keep adding categories especially for one time things. Time to think about this.

Well that didn't go as planned

In my last post, I talked about how I was going all in and really going to make April awesome as far as budgeting goes. I was going to end the month with over $500 and things were going to be amazing. Yeah, that didn't happen. I ended it with $110 in the bank. Now that is good but I did have to put off one bill until today because I didn't have the money. And I'm depressed because I don't have any money. I gave all my money a job and now have nothing left. That is sad.

I'm wondering how to change this mindset. I have money set aside for things that will be coming up, so that's all good. But how do I lose this feeling of having no money?  Is it because I know where every dollar has to go and therefore I can't just blow it? I've done that often enough and I don't like that feeling so I guess I should be happy. But I feel like I'm broke because there isn't any money just sitting there waiting for me to blow it. I guess that is truly what they mean by YNAB broke.

The good news is that we have refinanced yet again and that will be closing in a couple of days. That means that no mortgage payment next month. I want to use that to get ahead a little bit. I want to get some things funded - like auto insurance - and then try to get ahead a little. Get the bills paid before they are due and have money to budget into next month.

I guess I see now how things can be and I'm just anxious to get there. I will have the mortgage payment to play with and I should be getting my tax return so I'll have that also. That will be about $2600 to use to get ahead. I'm really looking forward to that.

I never was a patient person......

I'm going all in

I made it to payday without anything bouncing. I actually had $78 left in the bank. I sat this afternoon (when I should have been working) and revamped my budget. I started a whole new one with all the categories I need. I put in some that will cover the car registration next year and our car insurance premium in full in 6 months. I have categories for fun money for each of us as well as vacation and savings. This is what my budget looks like:

I think I have included everything that happens in our month. I have the dog's supplements and treats. I have their wellness plan. I have the pest control which happens every other month, so I split the cost between 2 months. I am fairly certain I have everything covered. That's kind of what I used the last 2 months for, finding all the expenses that happen and I forget about. So I think I'm good with the budget.

Then I sat and entered all the recurring transactions into the check register. By making them recurring, I not only keep track of what is coming up so I don't miss a bill, but I can project what the money will be as the month progresses. Here is what April looks like:

It's hard to see, but if you look at the end of April (the top) you will see that we will end the month with $528 left over. What you don't see, because it's not there, is there is another paycheck before the end of April. It shows the paycheck on the 11th, but it doesn't show the paycheck on the 25th. That means we are going to be ending April with almost $2500 extra. Say what???????  Now, as far as I know, we have no major bills or expenses coming up in April so this should be true. In fact, most of the time when I've projected it's been fairly accurate. So I believe this may well happen. This means that by the end of May we may be a full month buffered. We get some bonus money when school ends and that will only help the situation. I am trying not to get excited, but OMG!!!!!!  Could this actually work? Is it possible to stop living paycheck to paycheck?  I am cautiously optimistic about this whole thing. I just need to keep myself in check and not go on a spending spree because there is money in the bank.

I have cut ties with Netflix, Sling, and Hulu. I no longer have any of that. We are using strictly cable streaming. It was a little rough getting started, but I think we have worked the kinks out. I like it because my one TV didn't get Sling - at least not well - and I really like watching Travel Channel or the History Channel.

I think the real goal here is to be mindful of the money. We lived for so long on autopilot. Bills would come in and we had no money to pay them. Payday would come and we would pay those bills and then be broke until next payday. Rinse, repeat endlessly.  I don't want to live like that. I want to have enough buffer in the account so that I can set all bills on autopay and forget it. I want to not have to worry about money and how much we have. I think we are going to be able to do this. I really and truly do.

Saving more money

Continuing yesterday's theme...  I cut my Sprint bill by $30 but I will have to pay about $10 for Hulu, so really only cut it by $20. Then went and turned off the sports on Sling since football is over and cut that by $10.00. So I was at a $30/month savings. Not earth shattering but good.

Then, as I'm leaving work yesterday, I get a call from a number I don't know but I answered it anyway (rare for me).  It was Cox offering me a streaming deal. I currently have my internet through Cox and it's about $120/month. Add to that Sling, $44 (new price),  Netflix, $1150 and going up I believe,  plus the new Hulu charges, $10, and I was paying about $185.50/month for TV. And we have to switch between different things to watch different things. So we go on the antenna for local TV, the Fire Stick for Sling, etc. It can get annoying. And we don't get all the channels with the antenna, at least not in all the rooms of the house. The deal with Cox is I get internet, streaming TV of over 200 channels, including all the local stuff, for $165/month.  A savings of about $20. Add that to my now savings of $30 with Sprint and I'm at $50 a month. Not bad. Plus, I don't have to remember to pay 4 different things, it's all in one place. So I'm kind of proud of myself. We'll see how it goes. We have a month to cancel and there is no contract so technically we can cancel anytime. If we don't like it we'll just go back to Sling/Netflix/Hulu.

I think the important part here is to realize that just because that's what's been done, we don't have to continue to do it that way. I can look around and change things if I can find a better way. So the real success is being open to change and looking for new and different ways to cut expenses.

The road is never straight

While this is true for many, if not most, things in life, it is especially true for me trying to get financially right. I started off with, I'm going to pay $800 a month towards my debt and get out of debt in 16 months. Then it became, I'm going to pay $100 a month and not create any more debt and get out of debt in 2 years. Now it's like, I'm just trying to keep my head above water here......

It's been a rough couple of months since I started YNAB and while I know it's not YNAB's fault, I can't help but wonder what it would be like if I hadn't started YNAB. So let's recap:

December - started YNAB mid-December with the goal of paying off all debt in about 16 months
January - went well with YNAB, realized that debt payment was too aggressive and needed to scale it back a bit.
February - the wheels came off the bus. I overspent significantly and spent the rest of the month trying to recover.
March - some bills came due that while not unexpected, I didn't really have the money to cover and now we are really, really tight.

This experience can't help but make me wonder a couple of things. First, are we living beyond our means? Do we need to scale back in some areas, somehow? Second, is my spending that out of control that I throw the budget out of whack every month? Third, when will I get a true handle on our budget and have things covered as they need to be covered?

I was thinking about contacting Sprint and seeing if there is any way to cut our bill there. That bill is $225 a month.  If I could get that below $200 I would be excited.

I just got off a chat with Sprint and was successful. I got my bill below $200 so that's all good. I now have to pay for Hulu again, but I'm good with that. I also just changed my Sling subscription since football is over there is no need for the Sports Extra package anymore. So I'm down about $50 a month so far. Yay me.

YNAB Broke

People in the YNAB community say that they are YNAB broke. That means that your money is doing a job and isn't available to waste. That's a good thing and we are most definitely YNAB broke this week. In fact, we are so broke I'll be juggling a couple of bills just to make sure we get through the pay period. But that's okay. I like knowing exactly where we are and not checking the bank account and being shocked every time. So it's good.

Last post I wrote about a $19.99 charge that was showing in the bank and I didn't know what it was for. It completely disappeared. I don't know what it was for. It was there and then it was gone. Interesting. Now I have a $79.00 charge that I'm not sure what it's for. It's been there for a couple of days and I don't know where it came from. So I will wait to see what happens with that one. It's nice to be so on top of the money that I can see something like this immediately. Love it.

It's weird to think that I spent so much of my life not having any idea how to handle money. Living paycheck to paycheck was so normal I did not see how to do it any other way. I have tried so many different budgets and money strategies in the past but I always ended up in that paycheck to paycheck cycle. I just did not see how to get out of it. Why isn't the YNAB way of budgeting and handling your money more common? Why doesn't someone teach this to people? I just feel like so many people I know live in the paycheck to paycheck world and don't see how to get out. I know people personally that would live like that and not see a problem with it. That's the way it's done. In fact, I know people who live like that, have gotten lots of money, and because they really don't know how to handle money blew through it really rather quickly. Not that I'm an expert or could even help them at the time, but looking back I see it and realize what was wrong. They didn't know any better. Oh well, one thing I have learned in my almost 60 years is that I can't change people, I can only change me. And I'm good with that.

So in spite of being YNAB broke, I'm not stressing about money.  I paid my car registration - which I didn't plan for because I'm so new to YNAB - and that is basically what threw everything off. But it's paid and we will recover. Spring break is over and it's back to school next week, I spend no money during the school week. So things are good and I'm going to continue to say that.

I need to keep better track

I keep having these mystery deductions from my account and it's driving me crazy. I know I don't have a solid habit of adding transactions to my YNAB right away, but I also don't go out much and can usually remember what I did from one day to the next. I have a $19.99 charge on my account and I don't know where it came from. UGH!!!!  The problem with my bank is that it shows as pending but doesn't have a name so I have to wait until it clears to actually see what it is. UGH!!! So frustrating. And so annoying that this keeps happening. Of course, in my defense, the last few have not been me but charges I did not know were coming. So that's all good. Now I just have to watch the account to make sure I know what this is for. It is frustrating.

In other news, payday is almost here, all my bills have been paid and I have a few dollars left. That is so nice. To not be sweating hoping the paycheck clears before the bills do. It's nice to have a little cush. Alright, when I figure this out I'll come back and update this post.

3 months in

So I started this journey with YNAB in mid-December. That makes 3 months since I started. It's been a rough 3 months, but I think I have a handle on things. Though I won't let down my guard until it becomes a habit. But I can see and feel things changing in me. I realized how I was looking at things wrong before. Let me explain.

Before I would get paid and I would sit and pay my bills. Then if I had money left over I thought I could just spend it. Then we would be broke until next payday and would start the cycle again. I tried to get a handle on the finances, I really did. But I didn't know how to approach it so I just kept trying to do things the same way but to get different results. It didn't work. But I didn't realize this until I really screwed things up in February. I did the same thing I had always done. Got paid then went freaking crazy because I had some money left over. Well, I went way overboard and ended up in a hole. A very deep hole that took a long time to get out of. When I did get out of it, I swore that I would not do that again. I gave all my dollars jobs and the only ones that had any flexibility were the money in the just for fun fund. Everything else stayed exactly the same and I didn't touch it. I am now coming up on the 2nd paycheck in March and money is still where I put it. I'm very proud of myself and I think I finally understand how things are supposed to work. This has also changed how I view purchases. Today was the Arizona Aloha Festival. In past years, I would have bought a whole bunch of stuff I didn't need for reasons that I can't quite explain. Today we looked at all the places and I had sparks of 'oh, I want that' but I quickly got over most of them. The only thing I was seriously tempted by was a pair of Hawaiian material leggings with pockets on the side. I really like them but they were $40. I didn't like them that much.

So I guess things are going well. I wish I could budget more. It's a lot of hurry up and wait. We get paid, I budget, then I wait until next payday.  So Thursday I get to play around again and pay some more bills. Hopefully I will continue to get this and do the right thing.

Holding my own

Things have just been chugging along. All my bills are paid. I have money in the bank. I have money set aside for some bills that will come due in the next paycheck period. We call that funding ahead. Some people can fund ahead a month or two or even six. I was super excited that I could fund slightly ahead for the next pay period. Baby steps I guess.

One thing that has really been bothering me is how much I spend on that stupid Klondike game. I have spent $60 in March so far and it's only the 7th. At this rate, I'll spend over $300 this month on this game. So I'm going to set myself a monthly budget for this game and that's it. Also, I removed my payment methods on Facebook so that I can't just click buy. I will actually need to enter a credit card to buy anything, Better.

I had wanted this month to just be setting things right. Make sure nothing bounces and kind of figure out what my budget amounts need to be going forward. That's working pretty well, I just get annoyed having to keep moving things in my budget. It's not like I have to move the money in real life, just move the money around to different jobs. I guess it's okay, it's all a learning process.

I'm anxious to get my tax refund - that still hasn't arrived - and to get our next paychecks. I like this budgeting thing and I want to get further in my budgeting journey. I want to get a couple of good months under my belt and really see how this thing works.

Okay, I'm in class and we are watching a video so I should get back to paying attention.

The light at the end of the tunnel

Is most definitely not a train.

Yesterday was payday and today Hubby's retirement came in. I made out checks for the mortgage (it's been sold) and the homeowner's dues, plus I paid Mavy's next class on Wednesday - all with checks. That is the most checks I've written in years. This morning I sat down to budget the rest of the money and an amazing thing happened. I covered everything that needed to be covered and I had leftover money. what, what?????  That has not happened in so long I can't even remember.  So, I put some money in an emergency fund. Still had extra. So I budgeted so we could go out to eat 1 time each weekend until next payday. Still had extra. So I budgeted for the fancy harness I want to get Mavy. Still had extra. So I started budgeting for the bills that will be due next payday.  I'm budgeting ahead. Say what?????

Since I started YNAB I've seen people posting about how they are budgeting current money into future months. So they get paid today but the money won't actually be used until March or in some cases April, May, even June. I had no idea how that was possible and how you got to that point. I just couldn't see it happening for me. Like I'm some special case. But now I see how that can happen. Instead of paying all my bills and saying, I have $600 left over, let's blow it. I pay all my bills and then earmark that $600 for the end of the month's bills. Then when the next paycheck comes, I already have some bills budgeted for. That reduces how much I will use from that paycheck and allow me to budget for the coming month. Gradually the amount to budget forward will get larger and larger and pretty soon we will get paid and I won't even care because all the bills are paid already and we are not spending that money for another month. OMG!!! I honestly thought that in order to make this happen, ever, I would need a huge windfall of money. That's not true. You just need to pay attention and be purposeful with your money. On paper we make a lot of money, far more than we need each month, I just couldn't figure out how to get ahead. Now I totally get it. The best part of this whole thing is, I have a tax refund check coming in and I don't need it at all. That has absolutely never happened.

This whole thing feels like a huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders. I feel lighter than I've felt in years and years. I also see now how these things really are all related. In the past, I had always viewed getting straight with money as something I did and then finished. Uh, no! It doesn't work that way. It is an ongoing, continuous process that I need to work on all the time. Just like a healthy lifestyle. It's not something you get and then stop, you have to keep working at it. I really and truly get it now.

Goals and how to get there

I have very solid, specific goals that I want to achieve in the next few years. First, I want a house with some land. I would prefer if it's not in an HOA but even that part is negotiable. But I want some land. I would like an acre but will settle for 1/2 an acre. It has to have a pool, that is not negotiable. Then I want to get myself a car. I'm really leaning towards a Jeep because I've always wanted one, but I might change that. But we only have 1 car. We've only had 1 car for 3 years. And while 90% of the time it is fine, sometimes I just want to have my own wheels and be able to go where and when I want. I'm also becoming enamored of a cabin in the mountains. I would love a small place where we could escape for the weekends. Nothing fancy, just a small place on a little bit of land. Somewhere we could walk and do things with the dogs. I also want to travel, but that is becoming less and less important and I'm not sure why.

So I have all these goals and I want to start working on them. But I can't. Until I get a really good grip on our finances, I have to just kind of go with the flow. It's bugging me. I want to do something to make progress to move forward towards my goals. But I have to be patient because I saw what happens when I do things without proper planning. So it is one step at a time of me, but I'm not really a patient person.

With Hubby's tax refund, we went to Costco and stocked up on all the things we were short of. We like to go to Costco during the weeks we get paid and somehow we had gotten off track from that. So we bought enough things to last 3 weeks so we will be back on our payday cycle for Costco. The funny thing is I knew exactly what we were doing. I thought it out carefully and realized it was the best way to go long term. But still going through Costco and buying all that stuff was nerve-wracking. When the total came up as $302 I almost fainted.  Now, pre-YNAB I never would have thought twice about that. I would have said, it's fine. We had the money to cover it in the bank and Hubby's tax refund will clear on Monday so it's all good. But now, knowing in such detail our financial situation and my goals and such, I was sweating it. I guess that's a good thing. Being nervous about spending money, even if we have it, is a good thing. I spent far too long not caring about spending money. Definitely time for a change.

On being broke.....

So we had no money. Zero. Zilch. Nada. Zip. I was juggling when to pay what bill so that I didn't overdraw the checking account. I hate, hate, hate paying NSF fees, that is literally throwing your money out the window. Anyway, I paid the Internet on the day it was due and the electric on the day it was due (thank God for online payments) and was trying to decide when to pay the water and the gas. We had to take the car in for service yesterday and wanted to go to Red Robin's while we waited. I had some cash and said we could not eat more than the cash we had. So we had a beer, some onion rings, and some wings. Came to $30 and that was good. Then the car needed some small repairs which we had to put on the credit card. We knew we had to run to Costco today because the dogs are out of food, Hubby has money put away to cover that. When we finally got home yesterday afternoon, I sat down to check the budget - something I do every day now - and discovered that Hubby's tax check had hit. Woo Hoo!!!!!   That's means we have slightly more the penny shown above to get through the week. Now comes the hard part of how to use it the best possible way. It is extra money and as such, I don't want to use it on just regular things. But, since we were so broke, this can be used to help us get right again.  As I stated in the last post, I was running out of the dog's pills, the CBD oil, and I ran out of the tablets to clean my night guard (gross). So I could use this to restock everything and then when we get paid next week money won't have to go towards that stuff. I guess that makes the most sense. I want to be in a stable financial position and using this money to get caught up on things would be the best way to do that. We will be getting mine also and I'm assuming that will be soon, so we can use that and what is left of Hubby's to do some buffering or debt paydown. Okay, that makes the most sense. Then when payday hits next week, I don't really have anything to use the money for, just the mortgage. Okay, talked myself through that little nightmare. I have goals. I want to progress towards those goals. Sometimes I have to consider that actually taking 1 step back will create greater forward momentum.

Really broke or just paying more attention?

so we are really and truly broke. Like the only money we have is the cash in our pockets. We do not have enough money to pay the bills and I will be juggling the money until we get paid again. Which happens to be in another week. We are out of pills for the dogs. I'm running out of CBD oil. We are running out of dog food. Seriously!!! We have not been this broke in a long, long time. Or have we??? Is it just because I'm paying so much attention and that I have a goal in mind - getting out of debt - that makes me so hyperaware? I am trying to remember what has happened in the past. I'm sure that we have been in situations like this before, but because I wasn't paying this close of attention, I don't think I ever felt this way. The good point is that I'm going to make sure this never happens again. Ever. Ever.......

On another note, because we are so broke, I thought of looking for a personal loan. The thought being that I would pay off the credit cards and then just have one payment to make. Then I looked at the numbers. I would borrow $10,000 at 11.75% interest. Payments would be $346 and I would have it paid off in 36 months. Sounds good. Until I looked at my payment plan. In the plan I'm doing, I would be paying about $400 a month, the effective interest rate is 10.6% and they will all be paid off in 30 months - that's 6 months earlier. It is slightly more interest paid, $2000 vs $1100, but I will have done it all on my own. There is a whole lot to be said for doing it on your own. I think it will be a whole lot more effective in keeping me from using my credit cards if I struggle to pay them off. I want to get to the point where I put things on my credit card and go home and pay it off. Seriously. I want to carry no balance from month to month. So there are times when I think the struggle is so worth it and this might be one of those time.

It's really all one problem

Over on the YNAB Facebook page, someone made a post about something, but one line struck me hard. "What if you budgeted your time like you budget your money?"  Whoa!!! I kind of knew this because I am a planner junkie, but having someone else say it just really hit me. We only have a finite number of hours in a day, like we have a finite number of dollars. Using them wisely and making them work for you is super important. I think it's time to start thinking like this all the time about everything.

On another topic, it came to me this morning that I don't know how to handle money because I was never taught. My parents lived paycheck to paycheck. I saw that and that's what I learned. I'm not faulting them, they did the best they could with what they had, but I can only learn what I see and that's what I learned. By watching them I learned that payday was an event. We would cash checks, go shopping, have a big meal, maybe even buy a treat. So payday took on this huge significance that it really shouldn't have. It should be just another day. If you are handling your money right, payday is just another day and not any real special event.

Which leads me to food. I had to learn that certain foods did not have any special, magical powers. Cake or cookies did not hold the key to my happiness. Eating them did not transform my life into something special. I have been working extremely hard to change the way I think about certain foods. Cookies cannot cure all my problems. Nor are they special enough to be eaten when I'm feeling happy. Or sad. Or angry. Or melancholy. Or depressed. Or ecstatic. Or any other feeling. Food should not be related to feelings at all. It's just food. It just nourishes your body. That's it.

So I believe that all of these seemingly diverse topics, boil down to one problem. How I look at things. I look at time as not having enough and that I will feel a lot better if I waste some. Stupid. I look at money as something that can't just sit but will make me feel better if I spend it. Stupid. I look at food as something that will make me feel better to eat. Stupid. I need to change the way I view things. Meditation is helping me see that many things go on in my mind and have nothing to do with reality. Time to start looking at these things as things that can work for me and not necessarily make me happy. Time for a change in my thought process.

Sins of the past

So I started YNAB (You Need a Budget) in mid-December. I had spent months and months trying to budget our money and not doing a great job. Then I stumbled across UnDebtit. This allows you to enter all your debt and helps you figure out a way to pay it off. You have to have some extra income to put towards the debt, but even a little bit will get you out of debt if you have a solid plan. I liked this a whole lot. I like to be able to see what is going where and when it needs to go. They have a calendar that shows when your bills are due. Well, here is a picture of it:

This way I can see when my debt payments are due, when my bills are due, when I get paid, etc. This is what I need so that I can plan ahead and know what is coming. Through this, I found YNAB and decided to try it out. YNAB is very different from any budget type software I have ever used. In YNAB you budget the money you have and not future money. So I got paid on Thursday and am working on budgeting that money only. Now between YNAB and UnDebtit, I have a very clear picture of when money is coming in and when it needs to go out. I will say that in the 2 months I've been using it, I haven't missed a payment so no late fees which is awesome!!!! However, it has also highlighted how recklessly I spend my money. In December, when I started, things were a little tight but we had gotten some bonus money so we made it through okay. The first paycheck in January went well. I paid what I needed to pay and had a little money left over. The 2nd paycheck in January was similar. Then the 3rd paycheck in January hit and I lost it. I kept thinking that we had extra money because of the extra paycheck and so I spent. I ended up spending $780 on 'Stuff I forgot to budget for'  Seriously!!! Well, now I'm paying the price for that. I have bills due in the next 2 weeks and I literally do not have enough money to cover them. That is providing we don't spend anything outside the budget.

Initially, I was very, very angry with myself, and I still am a bit. But I have decided that I need to use this as a learning experience. In January, because things were going so well, I got cocky and thought I didn't need to check the budget/bank account every day. I also thought I could remember everything I bought in my head - that never works. Ever. So things got out of control rather quickly. So now, I am checking the budget/bank account every day and making sure things are on track. I don't have enough money to pay the bills, so I'm having to be creative. But, and this is super important, I will get through this and I will not let it happen again.

My initial plan was to jump in and start paying things off. I had the mortgage set to pay an extra $125 a month. I used UnDebtIt to work out credit card payoff using $800/month extra. And then got crazy when I ran out of money. Hello!!!!  So basically I was committing to almost $1000 a month on top of all our bills. Well, that was destined to fail. Of course, if I hadn't spent $800 on unplanned things, it might have worked for a while. Regardless, the plan now is to take a step back. Every payment is now down at the minimum. I'm going to stay there for a  month or two to just see how our expenses play out. Once I have a true handle on our real month expenses, then I can use that data to figure out how to get us out of debt. I am also building a category in right now to cover unexpected things. I'm putting $25.00 a paycheck in there. That way when things do come up, I will have a little bit of money to cover it. The plan is that unexpected things will come up less and less often as I get a handle on this budgeting thing.

So there we are. That's where I'm at today. Came out guns blazing  and got shot in the foot. Time to rest, recover, and regroup.

What do I truly value?

So I decided to start this blog for a number of reasons.
A) I love blogging or journaling or whatever you want to call it. It really helps me think and organize my thoughts. It also helps me see things that may not be readily obvious. So yeah, I love writing. 
B) I like to keep track of things and be able to look back and see how things have changed. Or not. Sometimes that happens and if I'm spinning my wheels, it's right there in black and white.
So yeah, I really like blogging and working out my thoughts this way.

So, money...  I've never been really good with it. Never. I have a feast or famine relationship with it. If I have some I will spend it. If I don't have some I will stress. And I've decided that needs to end. I want to be in a position where money does not cause me stress. It can be done and I'm hoping that this blog will help me figure it out.

Back to the purpose of this post. I've been following a health and fitness guy, hate to say diet guy, who is insistent that in order to change your body for good, you need to change your mindset. You have to not place a lot of value on the things that are no good for you. If you place a lot of value on things like cookies and cupcakes, you are going to want them all the time, and it will be hard to resist them because they are valuable to you. Well, it occurred to me that it's the same with money. I put a high value on spending money or buying things, or whatever and so that makes dealing with money difficult. So it's time to change that.

What exactly do I value? As I get older I realize that time is what I value. Time doing things that I enjoy. Time playing with my dogs. Time with my husband. Time......  So what I need to do is focus my energies on things that will allow me more time to do what I really want to do. So here is a list of things I really want to do......

• Buy a house with some land 
• Work agility with Maverick 
• Go to lunch/dinner when I want to
• Travel

All of those things cost money. So if I want to make them come true, I need to make my money do what I want it to and work for me. I know it can be done, I just need to buckle down and do it. And I need to change my mindset. I'm thinking of setting up a rule of not buying anything immediately. Anything over $10 has to wait 2 days and then I have to decide if I really want it or not. 

People with way less money than I have are able to do amazing things, I just need to focus on what I truly value and not what I want in the now.